Here’s your sign …

On the Edge of Common Sense
By Baxter Black, DVM

Public signs and announcements are often unclear. Hidden meanings lurk beneath even the simplest directive.

I’d like to propose that some government agency be assigned the task of rewriting them. Fer instance:

An announcement heard frequently in major airports SHOULD say: “Your attention please. The solicitation of funds by religious groups, Moonies, animal rights fanatics, perverts, sickies and other weirdos is not sponsored by the management of this airport or the airlines.”

See… Say what you mean.

“This parking space is reserved for handicapped persons. If you are parked here and can walk away from your car without the aid of a cane …it may be the last time.”

“CAUTION: The surgeon general has determined that smoking will cause your lungs to . . .